Peace of Mind

So as I've mentioned before, we all go to the doctor in Tokyo.  Up until this point Cora has gone to Tokyo for all her checkups and vaccinations.   But I have been aware for some time that we should perhaps come up with a plan for dealing with a sick baby that does NOT involve a two-hour (one way) trip into the city.

Fortunately, we have been incredibly lucky in that Cora is ridiculously healthy (knock on wood) and, up until this point, hasn't had so much as a cold.  But, again, I was aware that I was playing a risky game.

So....a couple of days ago we adventured off to a local pediatrician.  And by "local" read "a real, live Japanese doctor with limited English skills".  We had heard about this guy through the local expat community and another expat mom who had been to him once actually accompanied us.  His office is less than thirty minutes by car.  Cora isn't sick, I just took her for a checkup so we could meet this guy and get the low-down on his operation in hopes that when she is finally sick I won't be quite so crazed-chicken-with-it's-head-cut-off.

I also took a picture of the inside, but won't post it
because, well, it just looked like a doctor's waiting room.
and it was full of sick kids who don't need their picture
all over the Internets

Japanese doctors are a little notorious for being....different from western doctors.  Probably the #1 issue I've heard is that Japanese doctors don't like to be asked questions.  And they aren't used to it because they are so highly respected in this culture that whatever they say is taken as gospel, no questions asked.   Now, you might be thinking, "didn't a Japanese doctor deliver Cora?".......Yes, but he had extensive experience outside Japan and had lived and studied for some time in the US.  And he spoke perfect English.  This guy here, on the other hand, was the real deal.

So, how did it go?  Pretty well, actually.  The doctor was a little confused by the visit and called it "unusual" but seemed to understand what I was trying to accomplish and politely invited us to "yes, please, come back if baby is sick.".  He was pleasant and spoke much better English than I was expecting.  As for the question thing, I'm not really one for second-guessing doctors (I suppose I'm a little Japanese that way) so I can't really speak to that.  Plus Cora didn't acually have anything wrong with her.

The process of checking in was a little "unusual" for me though.  (Never having taken a child to a pediatrician in the US I'm sort of assuming that it's the same as going to any other doctor.)

So some things that were unusual:

1. He doesn't really make appointments.  You can call to consult (but his staff doesn't speak any English so you would have to be able to convince them to just let you talk to him) but otherwise you just bring your kid in and take a number.  He does have a quarantine area if your kid has, say, chicken pox.
2. Most people seemed to take a number and then go wait in their car until they thought they might be up.  Probably to limit their contact with germs and.....
3. .....the few people that did wait in the waiting room all had their face masks on. In fact, everyone but us had masks on.  I am betting it's standard practice when you go to the doctor here.   Gotta have your face mask.  (In case you're wondering, no I don't own any and never wear them.  I'm a clueless foreigner, remember?)
4. And probably the most mind-boggling for me was that the paperwork I had to fill out was limited to a half sheet with name, birthdate and contact information.  You know sometimes when you go to the doctor and you have to sign in on a little sheet first?  Then they give you a huge clipboard full of papers to write down your life story?  Well, here, it was just the sign-in sheet.  That was it!  No endless paperwork!  They didn't even ask for insurance information (although for the record it was really cheap).  Anyway, I was completely thrown off by that and who knows what I wrote down because I was not grasping at the time that there would be no more chances to offer information.  They gave us a little card with Cora's name in Japanese and an ID# for the next time we come and I think we can just show them the card and that's it.

But let's hope I never have to use it. :)

The Trip That Wasn't

This is a long holiday weekend here so we decided to take the bullet train to Osaka.  But first we planned to spend the night in the Tokyo Station Hotel, which I first mentioned here.

They've finished the construction on the hotel and it is rather swanky.  We had wanted to order Domino's Pizza delivery for dinner (we can only get it in Tokyo and it's the only real American pizza we can get over here period) but once we got there we decided we would feel like a couple of teenage rednecks having a pizza delivery.  Plus it was one of those places where they would've left it at the front desk and I already felt like the front desk staff was giving us the stink-eye.

At any rate, here are some more photos (courtesy Chad).  No, I didn't get any of our room.

completed station & hotel

very incongruous to the left

the dome in the main part of the station

more dome

So...how was Osaka, you ask?  Well, I don't know.  We never made it that far.  Chad and I smacked head-long into the realization that we can no longer travel as we used to when we were awake between 11pm and 3am trying to convince Cora-chan that she could sleep in a strange place. 

Yes, I know we're fools.

For the record, after we returned from the US holiday trip, I launched a sleep-training regimen with her that has been wonderfully successful.  She now naps and sleeps exclusively in her crib (in her room) and is capable of both putting herself to sleep and keeping herself that way throughout the night (with one scheduled feeding -- for the moment).  It's freed up a lot of my time that previously was spent rocking and soothing and keeps us from tiptoeing around the house trying not to make any noise while she naps.  I consider it one of my greatest achievements.

Or rather I considered it a great achievement until I realized that she can't keep herself asleep anywhere else yet.  Add that to the fact that we took a late train and didn't get to the hotel until just after bedtime.  At which point Cora was absolutely wild-eyed with all the disruption to our normal routine.

I wish I had gotten some photos of our room.  It had lovely high ceilings that echoed nicely when she let loose her newly acquired banshee shriek.  And there was a beautiful chandelier over our bed that I'm sure she would've been swinging from were she able.

So by 4am we were discussing packing it in and heading home which while boring, is a place where everyone is guaranteed to be well-rested.  Also, for the record, I would've been willing to stick it out and go on to Osaka and be sleep-deprived and potentially miserable for three days but Chad was a little more gobsmacked than I was and wanted to beat a hasty retreat and regroup.

Next time (oh yes, there will be a next time --we're beaten but not broken) we are going to try just staying in a Tokyo hotel for a night with some better scheduling and a new plan.  (In case you're wondering I did have sense enough to take as many "sleep association" things as possible and try to implement the same routine as at home.....it did not help at all whatsoever).

But we will not be staying at the Tokyo Station Hotel.  It was beautiful and I would recommend it.....just not if you are traveling with kids.

Yes, I know we're fools. 

Baby Food Exposé

 

Back when I was pregnant, I did some recon on the jarred baby food sold here.  At the time I was flabbergasted (and a little sickened) to discover some of the flavors that are sold:

 

 

Rice Porridge with Flatfish & Vegetables

Codfish, Tuna & Vegetable Risotto

Tuna & Vegetable Curry

But, I guess if fish is going to be a integral part of a baby's diet, best to get them started early.  These photos were at a Baby's R Us a couple of towns over.  They also had applesauce, peas, carrots and some other more "normal" stuff. 

Now that I'm close to the point where I'll have to actually use baby food I went back to my local Baby's R Us for a second round of recon.  And not only did I not find any normal stuff this time, I found the pièce de résistance of Japanese baby food:

Vegetables & Horse Meat in Cream Sauce

I nearly fell over.  Fortunately I have the time and inclination to make most of Cora's baby food and was just going to use the jars as backups.  But now that I know they'll put horse meat in it I'm not giving her any of it and will just order backup jars off the Internet.  I mean....horse meat.  Horse meat.

Gag. 

Hope it's not mealtime for you.
 

Tiny Traveler in Tokyo

A couple of weeks ago I had to take Cora to get her first round of vaccinations at the clinic in Tokyo (we have to go there to get her the "American" vaccines on the "American" schedule---the Japanese versions are different and not in a good way).  I was a little worried about taking a small baby by myself on the trains and subways for a two hour trip.   So I did what I usually do and scoured the Internet for tips on taking a baby through Tokyo's public transportation.   And whenever I look up something on the Internet I try to do a blog about it so that the next person looking it up gets another hit. :)

So first...the train trip.  It's a one hour express train trip into the city.  I wasn't too worried about this part because the seats are reserved and private enough to feed her.  I also bought two seats this time just for my peace of mind.  Let me stop right here and say that for the purposes of this post you can assume I'm feeding her with a bottle.  I don't want to get into breast-feeding etiquette....if anyone reading this wants to know my thoughts on breast-feeding in public here you can email me.

There is one larger restroom on the train with a changing table---it's not the ideal place to change a baby (a little grimy plus the motion of the train) but it would work if we were desperate. So I knew that if she started yelling I could probably calm her down. Unfortunately while we were waiting on the train (we got there too early) she got upset by the autumn wind whipping through the station (this happens in a lot of stations).  I would recommend dressing a baby really warmly if you're going to be spending some time on a train platform in autumn.

My biggest dilemma was whether to take the sling carrier or the stroller or both. A lot of my online research was on using a stroller in the subways.   I found differing opinions---some reviewers thought Tokyo was easy with a stroller (or a wheelchair for that matter) and some didn't.   I can see how it might be easier than old European cities.   But, to a person who only became accustomed to public transportation in a huge city recently, navigating Tokyo's subways alone with a big stroller would be a huge pain. 

Subway/train stations are labyrinthine with lots of stairs and they may or may not have elevators.  If one does have an elevator, good luck finding it.  Some spots don't even have escalators and technically you're not supposed to take a stroller on an escalator although I've seen people doing it (and would try it myself ).  For example, our little local train station has a lot of stairs and no other options.  So taking a stroller to it while alone would not be a good idea.  If there were two people to carry it up stairs, or if you have an older child who can use a small foldable umbrella stroller, it would be doable.  I've read rumors online of subway maps that indicate which stations are fully handicap accessible but I haven't found a link that works yet. 

So I went with just the sling carrier.  It worked out OK, but was hard on my back.  I managed to keep her asleep the whole trip.  While I was on the subway she would get scrunched if I tried to sit down and would start to wake up.  I was a little nervous about her crying on the subway because we would've been stuck with me not able to do much (except the pacifier, which is a must-have).  Even if we were to get off at a stop for a take-care-of-baby break there isn't really anywhere in the subways to go.  Some station restrooms have a changing table but that's it.  You may not even find that.  The station restroom I always stop at on the way (in Ningyocho) is little more than two holes in the ground and a sink.  There isn't even soap, much less a changing table. 

This trip I made it to the clinic (which has a baby room) without having to tend to her too much.  I did find this link to a great list of baby-friendly places and baby rooms in the city, but none are in subways.  And they aren't all conveniently located.

So for the next round of vaccines we're going to go on a Saturday with Chad in the car.  That's not to say I won't try taking her into the city by myself again.  Just maybe when she's a little older.  And not when we have to keep an appointment so I can take the stroller and have time to find elevators in the subway stations.  I'll let you all know how it goes.  :)

Surprise Guest

Two days ago my doorbell rang just as I was laying down for a nap.  I thought it might be a package delivery (that's usually who rings the doorbell during the day) so I went and opened the door.

Immediately, I regretted it.  It was a lady rattling off very fast Japanese and indicating that she wanted to talk to me and come in my house.  She said something about the baby and had paperwork with our information on it so I inferred that she was from city hall and had questions regarding our registration of Cora.  So I let her in.

She proceeded to ask me a bunch of questions about Cora and her delivery, only some of which I could make out and answer.  She wanted to see my Maternal/Child Health Handbook (Boshi Techo) which I provided.  I then proceeded to watch while she copied information from it.  I started to worry that I was way off base and that she and I were having two different conversations.  I also started to worry that she was a salesperson.

So I stopped her and called the company representative who helps us and translates for us and asked her to talk to the lady and interpret for me.  Lo and behold, I was correct----she was from city hall and was basically doing a well-baby check and making sure I knew about local pediatricians and vaccinations.  And for the record, she seemed to think our conversation was going well and she understood me. Before we hung up I asked the company rep if the lady would need to see Cora, knowing that Cora was peacefully swaddled in her crib and having her morning nap (at least someone was).  She said no.

Of course, as soon as I hung up, the lady asked to see the baby.  So I headed up the stairs and midway realized that the lady might not know what to make of the swaddling.  They didn't swaddle at the hospital and I had to order (and receive as gifts from the US) my velcro swaddling blankets and sacks because they don't have them here.  Swaddling can look a little bit like child abuse if you do it right and aren't used to it.  (It works though, when you have a baby who flails and stretches a lot.)   When she saw Cora, the lady looked a little surprised and immediately started jabbering and gesturing....I still don't know if she understood or was berating me for binding my child.  I unwrapped Cora (who started screaming--I was really pleased by this point) and let the lady see her and inspect her belly button (healed for weeks now).   Fortunately, she seemed to let it go and Japanese DSS hasn't come, so I guess the swaddling was OK.

Then she looked around my (thankfully clean) house---I believe it was to see that I had adequate space and bathrooms and things for the baby.  She commented specifically on the two bathrooms and went in my living room and looked at the photos I have displayed of our families.  She commented on the photos with grandmas in them specifically---I think she was glad to see that we had family somewhere, if not in Japan.  Shortly thereafter, she left.

A few times when I had Cora out in her stroller or sling in Tokyo ladies would comment on her being outside so soon (at two weeks old).  As a rule Japanese mothers don't take babies out until they're a month old.  The checkout lady at my local convenience store here (I take Cora in the stroller to get milk and bread almost every other day) has asked me if it was OK to have her out walking.  So this city hall lady was just about one too many people questioning me (plus I missed my nap :( ).  While I suppose it's good to have people check on us, I really wish someone had warned me that this lady would come to my house.  Anyone who might be reading this in preparation for having a baby in Japan be forewarned!                                   

Baby Makes Three: Tokyo Birth Story

So....little Cora-chan ("chan" is the Japanese diminutive for baby girls) is finally here!  I suppose I should first tell the "birth story" and then I'll get into some of what I experienced giving birth in a Japanese hospital.  Please be warned that I tried not to be too graphic, but it's hard when you're talking about childbirth....it's a graphic process.  ;)

On the morning of the 6th, I woke up having contractions.  I assumed it was false labor (I was pretty cynical about all of my pains by that point) but Chad was watching me and determined that he was not going to go to work.  Two and a half hours later, when they hadn't gone away and were still every 5 minutes, I called my doctor's cell phone.  He didn't answer.  I ended up calling the clinic we go to to see if they could locate him---turns out he was in a delivery.  I described my pains to one of the nurses there, who consulted with another doctor and told me to go to the hospital.

When we arrived at the hospital, I fully expected to be sent home.  But they admitted me, and labor started for real pretty quickly.  The doctor finally called me back and said that he would be there by 4pm and that I would probably have the baby by midnight.  By 4pm he still wasn't there (and he was the one who did the epidural) and I was in some pretty major, almost-ready-to-push pain (8-9 centimeters).  Chad had been fanning me and forcing jello and water down my throat (so you can eat and drink during labor here) for several hours by this point.  The doctor had authorized the nurses to give me some muscle relaxers too.  If you've ever heard labor contractions described as "toe-curling", know that that is a very accurate description.  And speaking of, there were other women there in labor as well and most, of course, were Japanese.  For the record, this business about Japanese women being stoic and quiet during labor is nonsense....I can assure you that they screech and moan just like the rest of us.  I do think that most of them were going without the epidural intentionally though.

About 6pm the doctor finally showed up and I begged him for the epidural, even knowing that I was really close to pushing.  I will always wonder if I could've just done it without (and had the bragging rights :D) but at that point I just wanted some relief.  He inserted it, and while it did help, it didn't help quite as much as I thought---I'm a little disappointed in the epidural.  Things slowed down some which gave me the chance to rest a little before pushing. 

When it came time to push I was still pretty tired but gave it all I had---her head still had to be vacuum extracted because she got stuck.  After that she came pretty quickly.  That part was pretty amazing.  Suddenly....there's a baby!

Unfortunately things went downhill from there.  I spiked a 103 temperature and had been sick during labor and my blood pressure dropped.  The placenta didn't want to come out either and had to be forcibly removed.  I held her for a little bit and then they took me to recovery and Cora to the nursery.  I continued to be sick and when they tried to get me up at one point I passed out (I don't remember this--Chad and I pretty much had to go back through this entire process because I totally blocked some parts out).  I think I was having a hard time coming down off the drugs but who knows.  The doctor said it was a pretty "smooth" and "typical" labor all in all......I gotta say, that was a little much to take from a dude who was two hours late with my drugs.  But he got Cora out in perfect shape and got me through it, if not in exactly perfect shape.... Chad and I were both a little traumatized and at this point I can't quite bring myself to think of doing it again anytime soon. :(

Edit: The whole shebang was 21 hours long and she was born around 2am.

So from here, some specifics about the hospital experience here:

Nurses & Staff: The poor nurses who took care of me immediately after labor were great.  While I was in labor they didn't do too much but a few of them rubbed my lower back.  After labor they didn't want to bring Cora to me until they determined that I wasn't really ill with something she could catch but they did bring her to me to feed at one point for a little while. They helped me get to the bathroom numerous times and dealt with my sickness and passing out.  Overall, the English was good, but the longer I was there the more the constant little bit of lost-in-translationness started to really wear on me.  And when I eventually got well enough to go to my room in the recovery ward, I started to have even more trouble with the nurses, but that is in the section on feeding below.

Paperwork: While we were in the recovery room I had to track Cora's diapers and feeding, certain aspects of my recovery and every time I took pain pills.  I had about four different forms that I had to keep up with.  I'm not sure if you have to do this in an American hospital too?  Please comment and let me know if this is standard practice.  By the time I got discharged, I was pretty sick of writing all this stuff down constantly.

Outfit: Another annoyance was the enormous outfit they insisted on dressing her in while we were there.  She wasn't swaddled but instead was dressed in what I called the "flying Elvis getup".  Everytime I tried to take her out of part of it they would come get her for a weighing or a check and she would end up right back in it.  I was ready to burn it by the time we left.

viva Las Vegas...there are little arms thrown up somewhere in there

Breast-Feeding:  I wanted to attempt exclusively breast-feeding so I had requested (and written on my birth plan) that she not be given formula or sugar water at all.  So, as happens, she lost some weight the first few days.  She ended up losing a little more than the 10% that is considered acceptable and the nurses started kinda harassing me about supplementing with formula.  I ended up getting kinda peeved about it (they were treating me like I was an idiot plus the communication between myself and the nurses suffered because of the language barrier) but I stood my ground.  At one point I even contemplated calling up the La Leche League and inciting a turf war (there's a sentence I never thought I'd write).  I ended up cutting a deal with a nurse to the effect of "if she doesn't start gaining by <this time> we'll supplement".  Fortunately, the milk showed up and I managed (over a pretty sleepless night) to get her gaining weight.  In retrospect, I understand a little better where they were coming from.  I'm glad I stood my ground but I also realize a little better exactly how close I was cutting it.  Feeding is going well now, and we bought a scale to monitor her growth which is good so far.

Room & Food: I had a private room and shower which were great.  I even had a view of the SkyTree.  And the Western-style meals were shockingly good.  There was a good bit of fish, but it was always Western-style broiled or baked salmon, tilapia etc.  No funny business.  For lunch and dinner there was always fruit, a soup, bread, cookies, salad, tea (with milk) and a main dish meat and vegetables.

room

view, but you can't really see the Skytree in this shot...
the blinds wouldn't come up

lunch

the common room

halls

Bathing: The nurses did give Cora a bath on day four and dunked her right in the water.  Chad and I got to see demonstration of another baby being bathed the day before that.  Her umbilical cord fell off during the bath and I'm still nervously watching it heal.  If I had my druthers, I would probably choose the American way of waiting until it heals to dunk the baby.

Free Supplies: I didn't get as much stuff as I had imagined.  No sprays or creams or bottles or medicinals of any kind for my healing other than pain pills.  Which are good, but some other options might have been nice.  None of the famous mesh underwear I've heard about either.    Diapers, wipes, Q-tips and alcohol (for the belly button) were provided for Cora while we were there.  And the awful outfit mentioned above.

Midwife: I signed up for my doctor's midwife service---we've had one home visit so far and it went great.  I really like the midwife---she checked me and Cora and declared us both fit.  She weighed Cora and confirmed that she is gaining on track.  She was very calming and helped me make my feeding schedule a little more manageable.  Her English is fantastic too.

So that's it!   I would love to hear what women who have given birth in America find odd or unusual about my experience! 

The Whole Nine Months

As we're approaching the big day I wanted to slide in one more (long) post about what it's been like to be an American pregnant in Japan.  I've read a lot of other blogs, forum posts and websites about being a pregnant foreigner here (as well as ones about being pregnant in America) and want to add my experience to the mix.  The topics/issues I'll cover here are ones that seem to come up the most often from others in a similar situation.  Left to my own devices I wouldn't really know what to mention because, well, I've never been pregnant anywhere before.

First, I want to say a little more about my OB and how we found him.  When we learned I was pregnant we more or less knew, based on the experience of expats with our same company who had gone before us, that we would probably be able to make some kind of arrangements to be in Tokyo for the birth.   In this, we are extremely lucky.  From my reading, most expats (many are English teachers in smaller towns) don't have the support of a large international company who make apartments in Tokyo magically appear for two months.  They have to figure stuff out for themselves. 

We were already seeing a family doctor here in the city because, for us, a 1 hour, 45 minute train ride was worth it to see an English-speaking doctor who did things the Western way in a medical clinic (TMSC) that catered specifically to foreigners.  But we like the trains.  And we like the city.  Others wouldn't consider it worth it, I know.  Anyways, this family doctor initially confirmed the pregnancy for us and then directed us to the OB who worked in the same clinic.  The OB was nice, Japanese and spoke almost (99%) perfect English.  He also gives out epidurals like they're no big deal.  Sign me up!  I knew coming to see him for checkups every month might be difficult, but really only my very last train trip from Gunma (at about 32 weeks) was kinda rough.  Again, worth it for me. 

It was only afterwards that I learned how lucky we are to have a spot with this doctor.  Apparently it makes a big difference to have a doctor who has studied and worked extensively outside of Japan and specifically in the US.  Add to that the fact that he's Japanese (one foot in each world, so to speak) and specializes in handling foreign-baby births and, well, you've pretty much got the golden ticket.  The only complaint I've ever heard about him is that he can get busy and overbooked, which is really a good sign. However, I recently learned that his schedule has opened up some since all the foreigners left in droves after the big earthquake.  So perhaps that helped us land in his lap so easily.  For the record, I did make an actual appointment to see him every time and I always saw him in person (although he did do a bit of unexpected appointment rescheduling throughout).  Contact me for his info. if you need it.

Second, a little about the hospital.  A few months in, the subject of hospitals came up and the doctor mentioned two, one of which he said was "foreigner-friendly".  Sounded good to us.  The friendly one we're going to is Seibo International Catholic Hospital --- it's a smaller hospital somewhat known for it's maternity ward. 

I'll stop here and say that a common place to give birth in Japan is a ladies/midwife clinic.  Especially in the countryside.  These clinics may or may not have a doctor in residence, sometimes they just have one on call for emergencies.  A lot of women (American and Japanese) really like these types of clinics because they feel more comfortable than hospitals. However, I am not one of these women.  I never considered a clinic when I also had a hospital as an option (again, very lucky to be in Tokyo).  My personal idea of "comfort" is long antiseptic hallways, doctors in lab coats, machines that beep and big closets full of drugs.  As for home births, I gather they aren't that popular here which is A-OK with me because the very idea gives me the willies.  To each their own.  But I digress....

We took a tour of the hospital several months ago and I was pleasantly surprised by how easy-going the place was.  Japanese hospitals and clinics are a little notorious for having lots of rigid rules regarding labor and delivery.  While I like hospitals, I don't want to veer into prison territory.  But this hospital is (supposedly) OK with the following (some aren't):

• bringing outside food in (and they have Western food options on their menu);
• having dads hanging around the entire time, including during delivery;
• letting you walk around during labor or bounce on balls, sit on weird torture birth chairs, shower etc.;
• letting the baby "room-in";
• letting the baby stay with you (and try to feed) for a while after delivery rather than immediately snatching him/her up and running off;
• the aforementioned pain medication;
• providing "lactation consultation" as well as other lessons on how to take care of baby.

So we pre-registered.  And soon we will see how the reality lives up to my expectations.  I'll definitely do an "after" post about the hospital as well.

the hospital, more photos later hopefully

Third topic: weight gain.  From all my reading I learned that Japanese doctors are infamous for harassing expectant mothers about their weight.  Rumor has it that doctors try to limit a mother's weight gain to keep the baby small and thus ensure easier deliveries for tiny Japanese ladies.  Afterwards, they fatten the baby up as quickly as possible.  I tend to believe this because it explains a phenomenon I've noticed whereby skinny, tiny-hipped Japanese women are toting around these roly-poly baby sumo wrestlers.

The recommended weight gain in America for someone with a normal BMI is around 25-35 pounds.  The recommended weight gain in Japan for someone with a normal BMI is 15-25 pounds, and sometimes even lower depending on the doctor.  I am probably not the best example for this topic since I've gained a grand total of 16 pounds and most of that was packed on in the last four months.  Which is on the lower end of even the more restrictive Japanese scale.  But I'll tell you my experience anyway.  My doctor has never once brought up weight gain of his own volition.  In the beginning I harassed him a little because I wasn't gaining any weight.  He kept telling me I was "fine".  Around the third time I brought it up he finally sighed and said "Well, to be honest it's better if you don't gain a lot of weight.  So really, you're fine.".  And after that I started to gain so I quit asking.  In general, my doctor is a pretty chill kinda guy.  I imagine I would've had to have some drastic weight gain for him to start bothering me about it.  He's asked me if I have questions at every appointment (supposedly Japanese docs don't like questions) and has humored the ones I did have in a kindly manner (although I did get the slight impression that I was being humored).

As for nutritional guidelines he gave me some U.S.-made pamphlets and asked me once if I was taking my folic acid.  That was it.  I struggled to find prenatal vitamins here (I only found one kind in a drugstore which was a tiny $15 packet that I couldn't read) and ended up just ordering American ones from Amazon.

Fourth: registering the pregnancy at city hall.  I don't know anything about all this.  No one ever told us to go register the pregnancy.  I've since heard that you can get some coupons for checkups and whatnot but I don't know about all that either.  I never received any kind of official stamped "confirmation of pregnancy" paper from the doctor either.  I did get the blue "Maternal and Child Health Handbook" (I believe the Japanese name is Boshi Techo).  This is given to all pregnant women here and is used to record all pregnancy details, baby vaccinations and other pertinent medical details until the child is six years old.  I've heard that it's so important that we may even have to present it to get the baby's passport, visa, etc. at the US embassy.  We also have to remember to get the hospital to give us a few English copies of the birth certificate for the embassy.  And we will have to go to our city hall and get the baby an alien registration card soon after she's born.  But again, that's after she's born....hopefully the fact that we didn't register the pregnancy isn't going to throw anyone for a loop.  I'll do a follow up post about that too.

Fifth: One thing that's been really neat about being pregnant here is the amount of information I've received at each prenatal checkup.  I've been kind of shocked to read about checkups in America and how nothing much happens at most of them.  Every single time I've gone in the doctor has done an ultrasound, even the first time to confirm the pregnancy (and this is all covered by our insurance as it is standard practice in Japan).  He has the machines in his office and does them himself.  At around six months he started switching it to 4D video too.  He measured heart rate every time as well as several of the baby's body parts to give me an estimate of the baby's weight.  Plus occasionally pointing out random features like stomach, kidneys, hippocampus etc.  Every single time.  I always get a printed off photo and the whole thing is put onto a CD that I keep.  It's a long CD now, going from a picture of a bean all the way to a little face looking back at us.  For the record, I also had all the standard tests one would have in the US such as glucose, group B strep etc.

And that's about it.  I think I've had a much more "Western" experience than most, largely because I was able to come to Tokyo.  No one has told me to keep my stomach warm or that I needed to eat warm foods, both of which are traditional Japanese admonitions for pregnant women.  At this point people tend to freak out a little if they see me carrying anything heavier than a water bottle, but I think that would happen in the US too.  Japanese women have been amused/slightly horrified when they learn that my husband will take a little time off work and be my main support person.  And some American women have too actually.  I'm not too worried about it but we'll see how it goes. :)

We'll also see how the blog goes from here on out.  I hope to still post regularly over the next several weeks so keep checking back---even if I have to take a few weeks off I'll be back eventually!

Birthin' Babies 101

Shortly after we moved we scheduled a private childbirth class (private only because I waited too long and there weren't any group classes available in August).  My doctor recommended the lady who taught it as she is an American who has worked as a labor and delivery nurse in Japan for thirty years.  She was also familiar with my doctor and my hospital (although she had never worked there) so she could answer pretty specific questions. I mainly wanted to hear how things go down in a Japanese hospital versus an American one. I've read a ton, but 90% of it is from an American-in-America perspective.

I wanted to include some of the highlights here as I have obsessively read every foreigner-giving-birth-in-Japan story on the Internet. There aren't too many so I want to contribute to some of the existing reference websites. If you aren't interested in reading about childbirth....well, sorry, but you're gonna want to skip some posts in the next coupla months.

Some of the highlights:

1. She convinced me to write down a few of my preferences and quirks (such as the fact that needles can make me pass out) in a "birth plan".  Prior to that my only "plan" was to get this baby out healthy as quickly and easily as possible.   Period. I refuse to be the lady who shows up with ten pages of detailed instructions including a song playlist.  It's just not my style.  That said, she convinced me pretty easily when she explained that while some of the L&D nurses will speak good English, they will all be able to read it well.   Which makes sense, as I can read Japanese (kana only) much easier than I can speak it.   She even gave me a form to fill out, one page, and suggested just bullet points. It's a reasonable compromise, I think.

2. She said that Japanese nurses are more likely to wait for you to ask them for help, rather than assuming you want them in your face the whole time.  And by "help" I mean if you just want them to sit and hold your hand and listen to you moan and wail.   She said they're perfectly happy to do it but they'll wait for you to ask.   I like this, as I tend to not like people in my face--even in times of distress--but we'll see.

3. She warned me that the third day after the birth would be rough for a variety of different reasons, one being that the pediatrician will show up and start obsessing over the baby's weight. I may have to negotiate with him/her to keep from giving baby sugar water or formula, which I would prefer not to do. She said the nurses shouldn't bother me, just the pediatrician. The nurses will help me, but again, I'll need to ask. I hear this kind of thing happens in US hospitals too sometimes.

4. That said, she also gave me some good information on Japanese formula and English instructions on how to make it. Which is awesome, because I had no clue and was just going to beg a lesson at the hospital. You know, just in case.

5. One thing I could find almost no information on is what supplies a Japanese hospital provides (for both the baby and for my recovery afterwards).   I was pleased to learn that it's pretty much in line with what a US hospital provides.   And everything on her what-to-bring list was the same as what you would be told to bring to a US hospital.   (The hospital had provided me with a very short list of what to bring but it was nice to have her verify and add to it.)

6. Apparently in Japanese hospitals you can eat and drink straight through labor. They just ask that you avoid fiber.

7. They'll dunk baby in the water for a bath before the umbilical cord falls off. It's the Japanese way and she swore it would make it heal faster.

8. She confirmed yet again that pain medication is rare here (Japanese women pride themselves on stoicism during labor pains) so for the love of heaven, if you're thinking about giving birth in Japan and want drugs make sure your OB and clinic/hospital have them and will give them to you.   This should be your first question, and then check back frequently to make sure the answer hasn't changed. For the record, my "birth plan" is going to say "I'll take whatever you've got."

Past that we did all the breathing exercises and "labor positions" that you see in the movies and called it a day.   This all took several hours, just so you know. If anyone out there wants the contact info for the instructor, email me.

City Slicker

This weekend we moved to our apartment in the city. As I mentioned awhile back, we'll be here for two months so I'm close to the hospital and my doctor. Chad is driving back and forth from Gunma which, so far, is going pretty well.

We didn't get a ton of information about our apartment (it was arranged for us by the company) until just before we came because, well, that's just how they roll.  But I'm pleased to report that they came through for us again....the apartment is in a great location (just south of Ueno Park which I first mentioned here) and is very nice. 

apartment building

apartment

our view

As you can see it's small (one bedroom) but suits us just fine.  The bathroom and bathtub are surprisingly large and Western-style, most of my appliances are in English, it's easy to cool and it comes with two nice Japanese ladies to clean it twice a week.  So far the only con is that it's on a hill.  And as great as the location is, I'm not going to be able to take as much advantage of it as I would under normal circumstances.  Normally I would be down in Ueno Park every day but since I currently have the mobility of a large arthritic duck, I'm not sure I can make it that far (probably less than two miles but the park is huge).

street right in front of apartment

down a very steep hill

nearby elementary school (surrounded by trees)

another neighborhood street

down the other side of the hill to the local grocery

The only other thing of note is that it's been a little hard to figure out where to get food, considering we limit ourselves by eating very little Asian food.  So far we've mastered pizza and burger delivery and we have our eye on a couple of local restaurants where hopefully we won't wind up with a plate full of sea urchin.  And then there's groceries.  Tiny little local city supermarkets/bakeries/butchers are a little hard for a country girl to wrap her mind around.   Although again, I wouldn't be nearly as concerned about figuring it out if I were able to explore more.  On Monday I had a disastrous experience trying to find what I thought was a large international supermarket on the other side of the city.  Long story short, it was tiny and didn't deliver.  But with Chad's help I finally located a small but adequate supermarket about two blocks from us and I'm currently waiting to see if a delivery boy actually brings the groceries I bought this morning to my door this afternoon.  Fingers crossed.  And then I get to try to make dinner in my tiny little city-folk-don't-cook kitchen.

the grocery store....it ain't Wal-mart

And one last thing....we didn't bring our full computer setup with us so blogging is a little more difficult.  So if things get a little rough around the edges for the next coupla months, that's why. ;)

Baby Swim Class

This week one of the other expat wives asked me if I would bring my camera to her baby's swim class.  It was "picture day" and she wanted it documented for posterity.  Of course, I agreed, both because I like to play with my camera and because I was interested to see (and blog about) the pool facilities.  Plus, a baby swim class is bound to be both adorable and entertaining, right?

The pool facilities are part of the Antares Sports Club.  Chad actually has a free (or possibly just heavily discounted?) membership through his company, but oddly enough I am not allowed to go unless I am with him.  Currently the chances of both of us getting up the motivation to go to the gym together are slim to none, although we did do it a few times back in Greenville.  The day may come when I want to check out classes (and possibly paying for my own membership) but don't hold your breath waiting.

Anyway, the location we were at was pool only so I didn't get any gym photos.  And for the record, it was pretty adorable. ;)



the entrance



the pool before class

calling roll and singing a group song before beginning
(and me trying to keep my lens from fogging)

starting class (it was an extra big class both because of
picture day and it being a holiday)



lining up

here (with her mother's permission) is my little model

and I can't resist posting a close up of this kid, who cracks
me up because she's hoarding both a ring and four balls

Baby Customs

This past week some of my fellow expat wives threw me a small baby shower.  America, China and Japan were represented and during the shower I learned some interesting Japanese customs involving baby mementos. 

First, I received as a gift a small wooden box called a kotobuki bako.  This box is meant to store the umbilical cord after it falls off.  Apparently Japanese mothers almost always keep the umbilical cord as a memento.  I know some American mothers do this as well, but as far as I know there isn't a special box you can buy for it.  You can read a little more about this tradition here.  As for whether I will actually use the box for its intended purpose.....the jury is still out.   The jury is leaning heavily towards "no".  I did ask what the kanji on the box said (thinking it said something about the umbilical cord) but I was told it has something to the effect of "happiness" and "congratulations" on it.  So I'm thinking perhaps it could also be used to store baby teeth or baby hair.

kotobuki bako (the sticker is to fill out pertinent
birth details and put on the bottom of the box)

Speaking of baby hair, I learned about another interesting custom regarding how the hair from babys first haircut is kept.  Here you can take it to a salon and they will have it made into a fancy calligraphy brush.  No kidding.  One of the shower guests brought hers from when her son was a baby and showed us.  Unfortunately I didn't get a photo but you can go here and see photos and read more about the custom.  You an also send in baby hair and have a brush made if you want.  From my reading I gather that this custom (as well as the kotobuki bako) are popular in other parts of Asia as well.  Apparently baby hair makes a great brush, but they are almost always just put away as heirlooms.

As for us Americans, the whole concept of a "baby shower" was our contribution.....they are not a tradition here.  We didn't do games but there was plenty of food and presents to "ooh" and "ahh" over.  The Asian ladies were also particularly fascinated by the diaper cake that one of the hostesses put together for me.

All in all, it was a lovely, international, educational, thoroughly enjoyable affair!  ;)

Buying for Baby

Today I went by the one Japanese baby/maternity store that is in these parts.  It's a chain actually, and there are two pretty close by.  This was my second trip to Nishimatsuya (site is all in Japanese) but this time I went knowing I could filter out a decent-sized chunk of the merchandise.

I've also visited the baby section of Aeon as well as those in a couple of other supermarkets and small clothing stores.  There are some consignment shops around here that have baby things and I'll probably be checking out one of those later in the week.  And we've got a big trip to Ikea in our future as well. 

Update: I forgot to mention that there is a Babies R' Us pretty close to us but it's comparable to Nishimatsuya.  Lots of clothes, strollers and carseats but no cribs and way too much Mickey.

Baby merchandise is a little different here than in the US---mainly things are much simpler, especially nursery furniture and decorations.  Japanese people don't appear to go overboard like Americans in terms of baby things---they get just the necessities.  All these photos are from Nishimatsuya, but they're pretty indicative of what is available overall in a few categories---I didn't take photos of the grooming stuff, diapers, slings or swings but they are there (Pampers and Johnson & Johnson are popular brands).  Or baby food, because that is going to get a whole post by itself in the future. ;)

Nishimatsuya--the rabbit is always recognizable

mostly summer clothes right now

baby kimonos! (those are rabbits, not aliens...this is not
the best pattern)

I could dress her up like a ladybug.....

.....or a watermelon.  (also duck, cow or bumblebee, poor kid)

this is the ONE crib that is available in this whole dang country,
except for what you can get at Ikea---they don't use changing tables here either

mostly Winnie and Mickey for bedding, which I do NOT care for

on the other hand, there are bajillions of strollers and carseats to choose from--
as many as in the US

riding toys appear to be popular

More Hanami.....and Pandas!

This weekend we went into the city for a doctor's appointment and to meet up with an old friend of Chad's and his girlfriend who were visiting Tokyo for a few days.  We ended up spending Friday morning at Ueno Park and Zoo which is destined to be one of my favorite places in the city.  Along with the zoo, there are shrines, temples, museums and green space all in a huge park in northeastern Tokyo.  We didn't get to see much, and only half of the zoo, but I know we'll probably go back multiple times.

Right now, the park is also known as one of the best places to see the cherry blossoms in Tokyo, although a lot of them had fallen by this point.

walking through the park

a few still left...

....here and there

Shin Shin---one very relaxed and hungry giant panda

the elephants were nice enough to pose

building in the park

After the zoo we headed to the doctor's office where we found out that we're having a baby girl!  I'm very excited about the massive shopping spree I'm going to go on now!   In light of that news, here's a little more pink! ;)